micro expressions

The Micro Expression of Sadness

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Sympathy for the Sad

By David M. Schneer, Ph.D.

In our last blog, we discussed micro expressions of fear. Today we discuss the micro expression of sadness and how to spot its various forms.

I remember one particular interview like it happened yesterday, although it was several years ago. I was conducting ad evaluation interviews in Chicago in August. It was sweltering outside, and each participant arrived cherry-faced, thirsty and perspiring. We had cold refreshments waiting for them. They were more than happy to beat the heat and examine our client’s ads in the air-conditioned moderating room.

That’s when one memorable interviewee (we’ll call him Joe) arrived. He too was melting in a t-shirt and shorts. He looked mighty uncomfortable, like everyone else. But there was something about him that seemed off. I extended my hand and got a limp, wet fish in return. Joe hardly looked me in the eye and his eyebrows were arched together. His lips were turned down slightly. His gaze was unfocused and distant. He slumped back in his seat.

Those who experienced trauma or who have suffered greatly can show a permanent face of sadness. Others can show it while going through an extended period of anxiety or depression. Still others just look this way for no apparent reason.

“Joe,” I said, “can I get you some water?”

“No thanks,” he said, his eyes looking right past me. “Just had some.”

Trying to understand more, I leaned in and asked, “Joe, are you okay?”

“No,” he replied, hesitating, his eyes welling up with water. “We just came back from the hospital and my wife has been diagnosed with inoperable breast cancer.”

“Joe,” I replied, stunned. “I am so sorry to hear that. Why are you here?”

“I just couldn’t go home,” he replied, staring down.

That day I cut the video and the audio, shoved the ads aside and just sat there and talked with Joe. There was no way he could review anything in his shape. Having had first-hand experience with family members battling breast cancer, I changed the subject to one of resources and hope. Soon he began to respond, sit up and look me in the eyes.

He never did evaluate the ads and initially he refused to take our incentive—until we convinced him it that it would be sweet to buy his wife something nice.  Empathy and sympathy can go a long way with those who are sad. Like Joe.

Joe’s story was extreme, but it illustrates how to read if someone is in distress and how to assist them, if that is possible. There are many basic signals of sadness that are quite easy to spot. Sadness can be detected from the eyebrows and lips in most cases.

My colleagues Kasia and Patryk from the Center for Body Language are showing genuine micro expressions of sadness below.

Cautions

Micro expressions of sadness are not necessarily always related to your words. Any myriad of stimuli (a memory, a smell) could quickly trigger sadness in someone. Also, there is another micro expression of sadness that cannot be captured on photos. This is when someone’s facial muscle tone fades and the energy has seemingly been drained from their face. This usually is a sign that something truly horrible has occurred or that someone is clinically depressed.

What to Do When You Encounter Sadness?

Perhaps they were sad before they met you. Perhaps it was something you said that inadvertently triggered a painful memory. When you encounter expressions of sadness, try the following:

  1. Remember this person is in pain; let the empathy and sympathy flow.
  2. To the extent possible, try to figure out what, if anything, you may have said to cause them pain. Apologize if your words were hurtful.
  3. Change the topic and talk about something that is more pleasant and calming.
  4. Offer to take a break before regrouping, especially if someone is really upset (e.g., has cried).

The Merrill Institute

Stay tuned to our next blog as we individually analyze the micro expressions of surprise.

Contact The Merrill Institute to learn more about Body Language Training and Micro-Expressions

 

Do You Know What Contempt Looks Like? You Will After You Read This

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Beware of the Lint Picker

By David M. Schneer, Ph.D.

Disgust and contempt are to a relationship what gasoline and matches are to a fire.

In our last blog, we discussed micro expression of disgust. Today we discuss the micro expressions of contempt—disgust’s despicable cousin. Of all the micro expressions, contempt is one of the easier signs to spot but somewhat tricky to define.

What is contempt? Webster’s defines it as “contemning or despising; the feeling with which one regards that which is esteemed mean, vile, or worthless; disdain; scorn.” Contempt can also have a positive spin, as when someone feels superior after having achieved a goal. One scientist claims to be able to measure contemptuousness with a questionnaire, concluding that it is a personality disorder all its own.

Sprinkle a little disgust on “contempt” and a relationship can turn sour fast. In fact, Gottsman’s marital metaphor of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse—criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling—is used to predict the failure of marriages with high accuracy.[1]

So, how do you spot contempt? It comes in many forms. Ever notice the “Lint Picker”? See below. The one on the left is a good lint picker. The one on the right not so much.

This is the person that picks stuff (lint, hair) off their clothes or cleans or picks their nails/fingers while you’re speaking to them. This is a form of contempt. 

We can convey another form of contempt with our eyes. When we roll our eyes, it conveys disagreement or dislike. If you have children, chances are they have rolled their eyes at you—whether you have seen it or not.

Yet another prevalent form of contempt is when we “crimp” the corners of our mouths. Some folks show contempt with both corners of the mouth crimped, but that is less common.

Rolling eyes and lint pickers are easy to spot, but what about other types of contempt? The two pictures below show a person (my colleague Patryk, from the Center for Body Language) with genuine expressions of contempt. Notice how the corner of the lip curves up. This could be a sign of dislike or superiority.

What to Do When You Encounter Contempt

We see the micro expressions of contempt in the face-to-face research that we conduct—especially in advertising or new product development when respondents see a concept that doesn’t resonate. Contempt in relationships can be extremely difficult to mitigate. When you see signs of contempt, it is a reliable sign of disdain, so try this:

  1. Change the topic to one that is more pleasurable and does not elicit signs of contempt
  2. Seek common ground with the person (sports, music, arts, etc.) that reduces or eliminates their contempt and helps to put you on equal ground with them, if that is even possible.
  3. Use humor to make them smile, if that is possible.
  4. If it’s a really nasty exchange, disengage and head for the hills.

The Merrill Institute

Stay tuned to our next blog as we individually analyze the micro expressions of anger and how to spot signs of it. You’ll be pissed if you miss it.

Contact The Merrill Institute to learn more about Body Language Training and Micro-Expressions

 

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[1] The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling; Ellie Lisitsa//April 23, 2013 https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-recognizing-criticism-contempt-defensiveness-and-stonewalling/

[3] Excerpt From: Joe Navarro. “The Dictionary of Body Language.” Apple Books. https://books.apple.com/us/book/the-dictionary-of-body-language/id1281489160

Something is Rotten in the State of Denmark! Or is it in Your Relationship?

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How The “Bunny Nose” Can Reveal Relationship Issues

By David M. Schneer, Ph.D.

In Shakespeare’s classic play Hamlet, Act I, Scene 4, the officer Marcellus spies the ghost of Denmark’s late King and utters, “Something is rotten in the state of Denmark.” The phrase is meant to convey that something is really wrong.

In our last blog, we discussed micro expressions of happiness and the telltale signs of a genuine smile. Today we discuss the micro expression of disgust—a sure sign that something is not quite right.

Disgust. Even the word sounds, well, disgusting. Its Medieval etymological origins emanate from the Middle French word, desgouster, and used as a verb disgust can cause loathing, nausea, or revulsion in a person. Example?  “You disgust me!”

We exhibit disgust as babies. According to Susan Heitler, “A baby who tastes rotten food immediately wrinkles his nose, curls his lips in an expression of disgust, and spits it out.  When someone speaks to you with a tone of contempt, you are likely to feel spit out from that person’s world.” [1]

Disgust and its close relative “contempt” can indicate that something is rotten in your relationship. In fact, Gottman’s marital metaphor of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse—criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling—are used to predict the failure of the marriage with high accuracy.[3]

While our next blog will focus on contempt (its meaning is often misunderstood), today we will show you how to spot its nauseating next of kin—disgust.

The two pictures below show a person (my colleague Patryk, from the Center for Body Language) with a genuine expression of disgust. In the left-hand picture, you can see his wrinkled nose—a reliable indicator of disgust. In the picture on the right, disgust can take the form of an open mouth. Growing up in my family, we would simply say about Patryk below: “Looks like he ate a plate of [FILL IN THE BANK]!”

What to Do When You Encounter Disgust?

We see the micro expressions of disgust in the research that we conduct—especially in advertising when respondents see an add that doesn’t resonate (literally stinks). When you see signs of disgust, it is a clear sign that something is amiss. Something doesn’t agree with this person. So, serve them something else, so to speak. For example, you can:

  • Seek to find a common ground with the person (sports, music, arts, etc.)
  • Use humor to make them smile
  • Change the topic to one that is pleasurable and does not elicit the bunny nose
  • Understand the person’s expectations about the exchange and adjust your questions and answers accordingly.

The Merrill Institute

Stay tuned to our next blog as we individually analyze the Micro Expressions of contempt—one of the most prominent emotions that can predict the collapse of many types of relationships.

Contact The Merrill Institute to learn more about Body Language Training and Micro-Expressions

[1] Susan Heitler Ph.D. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/resolution-not-conflict/201303/how-contempt-destroys-relationships

[3] The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling; Ellie Lisitsa//April 23, 2013 https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-recognizing-criticism-contempt-defensiveness-and-stonewalling/

How Can You Tell if Someone is Truly Happy?

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Look at Their Eyes

By David M. Schneer, Ph.D.

What is Happiness? That’s been debated since antiquity, rendering a myriad of definitions. Is “happiness” used to describe the general state of “well-being” or “flourishing” or are we talking the psychological sense, such as “depression” or “tranquility.” Writes Dan Haybron, Professor of Philosophy at Saint Louis University, “An important project in the philosophy of happiness is simply getting clear on what various writers are talking about: what are the important meanings of the term and how do they connect?” [1]

Lest we go down that philosophical rat hole, suffice it to say that it is far easier to spot happiness than to define it.

For example, can you tell which one of the pictures below is a person (my colleague Kasia, from the Center for Body Language!) with a genuine smile? Who is the happy one?

Spoiler alert—these are both examples of authentic smiles—one more demonstrable than the other. But more on this in a minute.

In our last blog, we discussed the medieval ghoulish history of Micro Expressions. Neurologist Guillaume Duchenne de Boulogne analyzed the heads of guillotine victims during the French Revolution to study how the face muscles worked.

Today, much of what we know about Micro Expressions can be attributed to Duchenne’s grisly work. Building on Duchenne’s legacy, Drs. Paul Ekman and Wallace Friesen conducted research that identified 42 facial muscles responsible for expression. These muscles can make over 10,000 configurations, but only a third of them (3,000) are related to emotion. Eventually, their research distilled 7 universal facial expressions that are intrinsic to everyone across all cultures and ethnicities. But first a refresher on Micro Expressions.

What are Micro Expressions?

Micro Expressions are involuntary facial movements that last a half second or less. While Micro Expressions are not proof of lying per se, they are reliable signs of emotions that may be tied to falsehoods or anxiety. These faint facial expressions could be early signs of emotion, the subtle experience of an emotion, or an emotion that is deliberately concealed. There are 7 observable Micro Expressions: happiness, anger, surprise, disgust, contempt, sadness, and neutral.

Happiness and the Authentic Smile

So, how can you tell if someone is truly happy—or masking another emotion?

While it starts with the mouth, it’s actually all about the eyes! A sign of happiness is when the sides of the lips rise symmetrically (as in the first picture on the left). In an authentic smile the eyelids drop, and the eyebrows lower accompanied by a symmetrical smile (see the picture on the right).

Duchenne’s research showed that the Zygomatic muscles that span the side of the face and attach to the corners of the mouth are also are attached to the Orbicularis Oculi. The Orbicularis Oculi are the independent muscles that separately pull the eyes back, producing “crow’s feet”.  Through his experiments Duchenne proved that, unlike the “crow’s feet” muscles, we can control the Zygomatic muscles to fake happiness or to signal subordination.

According to Allen and Barbara Pease, husband and wife body language experts, an authentic smile should be accompanied by wrinkles around the eyes adding, “insincere people smile only with their mouth.” [2] Today, a true or genuine smile is called the “Duchenne smile”.

The Merrill Institute

Stay tuned to our next blog as we individually analyze the Micro Expressions of contempt and disgust—two emotions prominent in the collapse of many types of relationships.

Contact The Merrill Institute to learn more about Body Language Training and Micro-Expressions

 

 

[1] Haybron, Dan, “Happiness”, The Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy (Fall 2011 Edition), Edward N. Zalta (ed.), URL = https://plato.stanford.edu/archives/fall2011/entries/happiness/.

 

[2] Pease, Allan & Barbara. The Definitive Book of Body Language (pp. 66-67). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

The Ghoulish Science Behind Micro Expression Research:

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How French Revolution Guillotine Experiments Led to Authentic Smiles

By David M. Schneer, Ph.D.

There is a nasty history and science to facial Micro Expressions that we will be discussing in this post. In later essays, we will cover how to spot and decode non-facial body language positions.

If you have an iron gut, read on, and you’ll discover a powerful technique that can help you communicate more effectively. But first, some definitions are in order.

What are Micro Expressions and Why Should You Study Them?

Micro Expressions are involuntary facial movements that last a half second or less. While Micro Expressions are not proof of lying per se, they are reliable signs of emotions that may be tied to falsehoods or anxiety. These faint facial expressions could be early signs of an emotion, the subtle experience of an emotion, or an emotion that is deliberately concealed. There are 7 observable Micro Expressions: happiness, anger, surprise, disgust, contempt, sadness, and neutral.

Why learn to spot these emotions? Consider these advantages:

  • Sales professionals can gauge if their prospect or customer is “buying” their product or service.
  • An HR professional can tell if a candidate is less than authentic about experience or past positions.
  • Senior executives can hone their leadership skills by ensuring that their vision is resonating among employees and colleagues.
  • Lawyers can bolster their sixth sense during jury selection or cross-examination.
  • Police detectives can pick out the Pinocchio in the lineup.
  • Product managers can improve customer feedback.
  • Focus group moderators can decode respondents’ facial expressions for better understanding.

So, what does all this have to do with smiling and the French Revolution? While the guillotine was used as a means of execution long before the French Revolution (even the Nazi’s used it centuries later), the genesis of the French version was originally proposed as a more “humane” alternative to swords or axes, which often left their victims mangled.

Grisly Experiments

Whether the guillotine was actually a kinder/gentler form of execution has long been debated; speculation abounded whether the condemned were conscious after death. Grisly experiments were conducted to test this hypothesis. According to Evan Andrews, a writer, and History Channel contributor, doctors during the French Revolution urged victims “to try to blink or leave one eye open after their execution to prove they could still move.” During the spectacle of public executions, some would scream at the deceased’s head to draw attention. Still, others would expose severed heads to flames or ammonia to elicit a reaction.[1]

An Authentic Smile

Despite these fiendish medieval experiments, one French neurologist made some important discoveries regarding genuine and “fake” smiles. While others before him analyzed the heads of guillotine victims to see how long, if at all, victims lived after being executed, it was Guillaume Duchenne de Boulogne who studied how face muscles worked using electrical stimulus. The Zygomatic muscles he studied span the side of the face and attach to the corners of the mouth. These muscles also are attached to the orbicularis oculi, which are independent muscles that separately pull the eyes back, producing “crow’s feet”. Through his experiments, Duchenne proved that, unlike the “crow’s feet” muscles, we can control the zygomatic muscles to feign happiness or to signal subordination. An authentic smile should be accompanied by wrinkles around the eyes. Say Allen and Barbara Pease, husband and wife body language experts, “insincere people smile only with their mouth.” [2] Today, a true or genuine smile is called the “Duchenne smile”.

The Merrill Institute Mission

Others have built upon Duchenne’s legacy including, but not limited to, Dr. Paul Eckman, Haggard and Isaacs, famed psychologists Wallace Friesen and Dr. David Matsumoto, Swedish physician Carl-Herman Hjortsjö, and The Center for Body Language—to name a few.

We at the Merrill Institute intend to build on this legacy, both in Micro Expressions and Body Language training. Stay tuned to our next blog as we individually analyze the 7 Micro Expressions as well as introduce the concept of the 88 Major Body Language Positions.

Contact The Merrill Institute to learn more about Body Language Training and Micro-Expressions

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[1] Andrew Evans, 8 Things you Didn’t Know about the Guillotine, https://www.history.com/news/8-things-you-may-not-know-about-the-guillotine

[2] Pease, Allan & Barbara. The Definitive Book of Body Language (pp. 66-67). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

How a Body Language Technique Revealed Fear and Loathing in the Channel—Just BLINK!

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David M. Schneer, Ph.D

BLINKing is Not What you might be thinking.

We emote faster than we think. Which is exactly why the BLINK technique is so powerful.

BLINK stands for Body Language Intuition Numinology Know-How—pioneered by the Center for Body Language. The basic premise of this technique is that instead of asking someone a question and waiting for their reply, you posit a supposition and watch the reaction on their face. That is, did they show signs of disgust, contempt, happiness, fear, sadness, surprise—or no emotion at all? This technique takes advantage of the fact that we think slower than we emote. Our emotions are controlled by the part of the brain typically referred to as the “frog brain” or “reptile brain”. Ask a person a question and they have time to formulate an answer. Use the BLINK technique and watch the answer flash across their face without them even knowing it.

USING THE BLINK TECHNIQUE IN REAL LIFE SETTINGS

At The Merrill Institute, we used the BLINK technique in a qualitative channel study among Value Added Resellers (VAR), and the technique yielded jaw-dropping results. Back to that in a minute. First, let’s understand the target audience in this study.  These VARs resold computer software, hardware, and networking products to small and medium-size companies, providing value beyond order fulfillment.

I used the BLINK Technique among VARs in the New York area during a series of hour-long in-person interviews. The objective of the study was to understand the needs of VARs selling their particular devices. What kind of support would they require? Better pricing and margins? Lead generation support? Market Development Funds? What would be the ideal channel plan? After asking a variety of questions regarding channel needs, we turned our attention to the major brands in the space.

BLINK IN ACTION

“So,” I asked one of the VARs, “would it matter to you who the manufacturer is behind this channel plan?”

“Yes,” he replied, and before he could say anything else, I interjected the following presupposition—“Suppose I told you that the manufacturer behind this plan is Brand X”. In an instant, the VAR flashed a half smile of contempt, a quick sign of fear, and then a sure sign of disgust… but then he said, “Brand X would be fine.” I could sense something was amiss.  My spidey senses were tingling.

“You know”, I said to him, “I’m sensing that there’s more to the story about Brand X.”

He looked at me and said, “Brand X is fine from the perspective of customer awareness. Everyone knows brand X. But I’ll never do business with them again after they went around my back directly to my clients.” We later learned that this VAR had registered a sizeable deal (over 50 devices) with Brand X—only to find out later that Brand X tried to cut him out of the deal. The lesson? Deal registration and no channel conflict are sacred!

We might have missed that had we not employed the BLINK technique. This is just one of the many instances the BLINK technique can be used. For example, an HR executive could quickly assess whether a job candidate is less than forthcoming about their previous work experiences.

Tune in for more of our articles on how to incorporate body language knowledge into your business or relationships and if you need a deeper dive into the science behind body language, please contact us

The Merrill Institute can train you or your corporation to use the BLINK Technique to better understand body language and micro-expressions.